GirlSpeak

I’m married to probably the coolest girl I’ve ever met.  I’m not just saying that because she’s going to read this before I have the opportunity to get off the computer, she REALLY is cool.  Great humor, good style, very attractive, intelligent, and talented out her ears.  The first time I saw her I was struck, completely blown away!  I had no ideal there were girls out there like her, so I lied the very best I could, played out the Humphries Charm, and pulled the major upset of the century by marrying Mariah 15 years ago.

I’d say we’ve been happily married ever since, but I’m a pastor and am kinda working on the lying bit.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my marriage, and can honestly say Mariah is my best and dearest friend, but marriage is a tricky thing.  Communication always seems to be one of our biggest hurdles, along with every other marriage I suppose.  I have tried to master the “listen, while focusing all my attention on something else” technique that my father taught me as a young lad, and for the most part it works.  At least she lets me think it works, knowing that if I was actually listening I would try to fix whatever she’s talking about, when in reality she just wants to talk out loud about the issue in the presence of another human being.  Its this creative dance around communication that makes our marriage interesting.

I had no ideal that this communication issue was going to translate into my relationship with the “girls”.   My girls are so cute, and they take after their mom in so many ways!  They love crafts, music, goofing around, and hanging out with their older brother.  They also like talking to their dad while he’s watching Sportscenter, or trying to read, or attempting to catch a quick nap.  I’ve tried the age old technique that works so well with marriage, but it completely doesn’t work with children.  If I fake listening to my wife, the worst that will happen is a little huff and then she’ll storm out of the room and give me the quite time I was looking for in the first place.  If I fake listening to my daughters, I can inadvertently agree to front row Hannah Montana tickets, or a birthday party in Disney World.  This is where the difficulty comes into play, if I listen to them I could spend an hour talking about how some other sucker dad bought the Hannah Montana tickets and I could end up feeling my manhood has just been manipulated!  I’ve found myself stuck, trying to listen, not fully understanding, wanting nothing more than to escape to play some shoot-it-up game with my dear son.

Girlspeak, the endless desire for girls to talk about the emotional drama that comes from dressing hip, working with other women, the endless relational instability of Barbie and Ken, and the desire to be viewed as a woman that hasn’t had three children.  God help me!  I just want to live in peace and tranquility!